TRUST 
  TRUST is a very important factor for all relationships.
  When trust is broken, it is the end of the relationship. Lack of trust leads
  to   suspicion, suspicion generates anger, anger causes enmity and
  enmity   may result in separation. 
  
  A telephone
  operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered,
  "Public Utilities Board." There was silence. She  repeated,
  "PUB." There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the
  line, she Heard a lady's voice, "Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry,
  I got the number from my Husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it
  is." 
  
  Without
  mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if  the telephone
  operator answered with just "hello" instead of "PUB". 
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  NO POINTING FINGERS 
  
  A man asked
  his father-in-law, "Many people praised you for a successful marriage.
  Could you please share with me your secret?" 
  The
  father-in-law answered in a smile, "Never criticize your wife for her
  shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that
  because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better
  husband than 
  you." 
  
  We all look
  forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face.
  Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a
  scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should
  always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four
  fingers are pointing at ourselves. 
  
  If we forgive
  the others, others will ignore our mistake too.  
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CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS? 
  
  A person
  visited the government matchmaker for marriage, SDU, and requested "I am
  looking for a spouse. Please help me to find a suitable one." The SDU
  officer said, "Your requirements, please." "Oh, good looking,
  polite, humorous , sporty, knowledgeable, good in singing and dancing.
  Willing to accompany me the whole day at home during my 
  leisure hour,
  if I don't go out. Telling me interesting stories when I need companion for
  conversation and be silent when I want to rest." The officer listened
  carefully and replied, "I understand you need television." 
  
  There is a
  saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf
  husband ,because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the
  deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and
  deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship.
  Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and
  discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins. 
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NO OVERPOWERING 
  
  Many
  relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another,or demands
  too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their
  spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the
  case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "It is
  easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character." 
  
  It is not
  easy to change. Thus, having high expectation on changing the spouse
  character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness. 
  
  It would be
  less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations.. 
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RIGHT SPEECH 
  
  There is a
  Chinese saying which carries the meaning that "A speech will either
  prosper or ruin a nation." Many relationships break off because of wrong
  speech. When a couple is too close with each other,we always forget mutual
  respect and courtesy. We may say anything without considering if it would
  hurt the other party. 
  
  A friend and
  her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a
  helmet saw her and shouted,"Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in
  the secondary school." On the way home, her millionaire husband teased
  her, "Luckily you married me.Otherwise you will be the wife of a
  construction worker." She answered ,"You should appreciate that you
  married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you." 
  
  Frequently
  exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a
  broken egg - cannot be reversed. 
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PERSONAL PERCEPTION 
  
  Different
  people have different perception. One man's meat could be another man's
  poison. A couple bought a donkey from the market. On the way home,a boy
  commented, "Very stupid. Why neither of them ride on the
  donkey?"Upon hearing that, the husband let the wife ride on the donkey.
  He walked besides them. Later, an old man saw it and commented, "The
  husband is the head of family. How can the wife ride on the donkey while the
  husband is on foot?" Hearing this, the wife quickly got down and let the
  husband ride on the donkey. 
  
  Further on
  the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, "How can the man ride
  on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman." 
  The husband
  thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then, they met a young
  man. He commented, "Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two
  persons. They are cruel to you." Hearing that, the husband and wife
  immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders. 
  
  It seems to
  be the only choice left. Later, on a na rrow bridge, the donkey was
  frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river.
  You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you. Never in
  the past, not at present, and never will be in the future. 
  
  Thus, do not
  be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear.
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BE PATIENT 
  
  This is a true
  story which happened in the States. A man came out of his home to admire his
  new truck. To his puzzlement, his three-year-old son was happily hammering
  dents into the shiny paint of the truck. The man ran to his son, knocked him
  away, hammered the little boy's hands into pulp as punishment. When the
  father calmed down, he rushed his son to the hospital. 
  
  Although the
  doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to
  amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the
  surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, " Daddy,I'm
  sorry about your truck." Then he asked, "but when are my fingers
  going to grow back?" The father went home & committed 
  suicide. 
  
  Think about
  this story the next time someone steps on your feet or u wish to take
  revenge. Think first before u lose your patience with someone u love. Trucks
  can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we
  fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We
  forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge. 
  
  People make
  mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a
  rage will haunt us forever.
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